I wonder what the story that preceded the prodigal son is. Luke tells us simply that “The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’” but I wonder what transpired before that. After all, the next verse indicates that it took a little time after Dad gave him his share of the family estate for Jr. to actually leave, so I suspect that there was some time of pondering, questioning and wondering prior to the request.
What was going through his mind in the days, weeks and months prior? He lived in plenty and protection, yet there was the unknown calling him. Was it curiosity that drew him outside the walls of his father’s protection? The desire to see the unknown?
Was it some contempt for his safe, familiar surroundings? To escape from under the thumb of ‘the man’? Maybe he felt trapped by the security and predictability of home. He wanted some adventures and thrills. Maybe he was just bored.
In those prior days, did he sneak out at night into the nearby town to taste what he was missing, returning just before dawn and the rise of Dad and the rest of the family? Did what he found pull at his heart, calling him away?
And if he did, I wonder, did Dad know what he was up to? Did he watch him sneak away and return, never letting on that he knew? What did Dad do to prevent what he saw coming, what eventually happened? And if he did know, why didn’t he lock the doors from the outside and bar the windows?
My oldest daughter is 11. I’ve noticed that she’s begun to test the waters. She’s learned that she can make her own choices. She’s learned that when Mom and Dad aren’t around, they can’t see what she’s doing or hear what she’s saying and she can do what she wants, seemingly without consequence. I know because she’s not as good at it as she thinks. She slips and says things that she would normally only say when we aren’t there. Nothing horrible, mind you, but not what we’ve taught her to do.
Don’t hear me wrong, she’s a great kid and I’m immensely proud of her. Her mother and I are doing our best – and praying like mad – to see that she’s prepared for the journey ahead. She’s just nearing the precipice that we all come to and eventually jump from. The ways of the world are calling, and she’s listening.
It’s not too long before she will be the prodigal.
Not physically (I pray!), but spiritually. She will decide that she’s knows her way and she’s going to go off on her own. She’s learned enough from Mom and Dad and church, but it’s time to go her own way. Oh, she won’t go far, she’ll tell herself, she’ll be fine. And God is watching her, as he did all of us, and weeping, hoping that one day she’ll be back. And somehow, I don’t know how, he’s not locking the doors and barring the windows. He’s not thundering from the heavens “No! Don’t go!” I guess he knows that he will never truly have her love unless he lets her leave.
Me, I want padlocks, deadbolts, surveillance cameras, electronic tethers and bars on the windows. I want to call after her, reasoning, begging and pleading. But that’s not God’s way, so I swallow hard, pray harder, teach, discipline, wait and watch. Just as that father that Jesus talked about did.
I remember a day back when I wasn’t much older than Jessica is now. We were at a neighbors for a cookout. Their dog was chained in the yard and as I walked up, the dog in it’s excitement circled around me, tangling my legs in the chain and I fell. “Damn dog!” I shouted. Dad was only a few feet away and I looked up quickly, expecting a reprimand, but none came, he just stared at me.
The moment passed and I thought I had dodged a bullet. I remember wondering why he hadn’t said anything, wondering what that look was about. Now I think I know. I think it was a sort of resignation that his work as a Dad was nearly done. Now all he could do was watch and hope that the prodigal would come home soon.
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