Issues, issues, issues

I had written this back in July but never posted it. I guess I thought it needed something, I don’t know what. Seems finished as I look at it here in November, so here it is. 🙂
Dan Edelen has a great post today back in July about divisions and finger pointers, appropriately entitled Throwing Stones in Glass Houses of Worship.
Prompted by a debate over the modern existence of the charismata (Dan’s a charismatic) on another blog, he rightfully points out that there are nut-jobs in every stripe of Christianity, including our own. We love to tear down those who are in another tribe by singling out the public crazies and then characterising the entire groups as just like them. It’s far too easy to do, and I find myself doing it too. You find out someone’s denomination and you immediately assume a lot about them, based on the infamous in their group. It’s sad and we need to battle this every day.
I once had a guy show up here from a comment I left on another blog. He came by, not because he thought I had said something interesting, but because he had heard I was from the ICOC. I mentioned that there were reforms happening and his comment, after many disparaging comments on my church (calling it a cult) and indirectly on me, was something along the lines of “Time will tell just what kind of reformer you are.” Part of me was offended, but mostly I didn’t care. I was seeking the truth and continue to do so, and will hopefully continue to grow and change. Hang around and see what I am, I thought. Unfortunately, he left no email address and he hasn’t bothered to come back. He had made his statement on my faith, and that was it.
Why do we do that? Certainly, there are plenty of crazies in the ICOC saying and doing crazy things. There are wacky, embarrassing mainliners too, and Baptists, Methodists, Catholics and on and on. They seem to get all the attention. Why? Because we like to look at them, point our fingers and say “Look at that nut job!”. If they’re nuttier than we are, then we can breathe a sigh of relief and take the focus off of ourselves.
The other night we had a little knock down drag out thing with the girls before bed. Jessica was wronged by her sister, reacted badly and then I reacted badly to her. She lamented that she had told them repeatedly that she didn’t want them in her room when she wasn’t around. Why do they keep doing it when she asked them not too? She was indignant.
I reminded her that she’s been doing that to me for 12 years. Why doesn’t she stop? I think it hit home. 😀
Near the end of our talk, I had to apologize for yelling at her. I told her that it’s just part of being a Schaefer man. I’m not sure what it is, but we slide right into shouting with the quickness. My Dad does it and his dad did it too. We hate it and we battle it, but it rears its ugly head all too often.
My point was that we all have issues, it’s part of being human. To keep harping on others’ issues is to pretend that we don’t have our own and only distances us from those who see their own issues all to clearly and are looking for help in dealing with them. When people do wacky things to us or act in wacky ways as Christians, we need to fight the natural reaction to judge and instead act in grace. Sure, we can teach, admonish and even rebuke where appropriate, but all in the spirit of grace.
What would Christianity look like if we all focused on these 2 things?

  1. Doing our absolute best to act according to God’s will (and always learning better what that means).
  2. Overlooking it as much as possible when others fail at 1.

Proving That I’m Old

We were talking about old school high tech stuff at work. You know, the stuff that was ‘the bomb’ back in the day:

  • Mom and Dad had one of the first ‘pocket’ calculators. Made by Texas Instruments, it was about an inch thick, 3″ wide and 5 ” long, took 4 AA batteries (rechargeable with a built in charger), had red LED numbers and buttons that clicked loudly when you pushed them. It could do all the advanced stuff, you know, add, subtract, multiply and divide. They might even still have it
  • In his ’77 Cutlass (Mandarin Orange with the tan ‘landau’ vinyl top, natch’), Dad had an under the dash cassette player. Now, these things were big targets for thieves, so it was mounted on a slide and you kept it under the seat when you weren’t using it.
  • Grandpa has a slightly lower tech solution for listening to cassettes in his ’80 Citation. He had the in dash AM radio, the under dash FM converter that played FM stations through the AM radio by tuning into a special AM station (like the things folks use now to listen to their iPods in the car). Next to that, under the dash, was an 8-track player that, I think, played the 8-tracks through an FM station (which then went through an AM station). He then played his cassettes through cassette adapter in the 8-track player. There may have been some loss of sound quality once the signal made it to the lone 6×9 speaker in the dash.
  • In my ’80 Chevy Monza I had an in-dash Pioneer AM/FM cassette player. Under that I had the 8 or 10 band EQ/amp with aux. input for my Sony Discman that I had mounted on the accessory flex arm and mount pad attached to the passenger seat. I of course had the obligatory 6×9 speakers in custom plywood boxes in the back.
  • Mom and Dad bought their first color TV in 1975. It was the best of it’s day – a big 23″ Zenith in the ‘wood’ cabinet. They were still using it up until a couple years ago. We didn’t have the Zenith ‘clicker’ remote, though, we had to get up and turn the knobs (yes, knobs – clack, clack, clack) ourselves.
  • Our school was fairly advanced. I remember using computers back in 6th or 7th grade. Commodore PETs. No disc drives, all programs and data was stored on cassette tape.
  • In High school I had friends with Commodore 64’s adn Timex Sinclair computers that you could hook up to your TV.
  • We, of course, had the Atari 2600. But the one we had wasn’t called the 2600 because there wasn’t any other model. It was just Atari. Yes, Mom and Dad still have it. My kids and my sister’s love to play it when we go to Toledo.
  • My first stereo was bought piece by piece. I had 60 watt Jensen speakers with 10″ woofers and a 40 watt per Chanel Akai receiver (with touch sensitive volume control, but no remote). The coolest thing was my JVC dual cassette deck that would shuffle play songs on tape (provided there was the appropriate 4 second gap in between songs). It would click and snap, fast forward and reverse through the tape to find the 4th song, then the 3rd, then the 8th. This was before CDs and digital recording made it easy to do random & shuffle.
  • Dad’s still got his high end stereo he bought in 1965. A Fisher FM tuner amp (with tubes and the ‘Stereo Beam‘), Electro-Voice speakers and a record changer. He’s since added a new single turntable, a 3M Wollensak cassette deck and a Pioneer magazine style CD changer. He has to switch between the cassette player and the CD changer because the Fisher doesn’t have enough inputs. It was a serious high end system in it’s day and still sounds pretty good now. It’s in a nice wood cabinet the size of a sofa.

Ah, memories …
I’m sure I could think of more. What sort of old school high tech stuff do you remember?

Dan on Discipling

Dan Edelen writes on discipling, pointing out that it’s in God’s time, not ours, that He makes things beautiful:

I don’t know how many times I’ve seen a “discipler”—typically loaded down with one agenda after another—run roughshod over a “disciplee.” I’ve lost track of how many people have walked away from the faith or turned irrevocably bitter because a discipler didn’t take the time to ask, “What is God doing in this person’s life?” Asking that question rather than stating, “And now, this is what I will be doing in this person’s life,” would have made a world of difference. …
Anymore, I feel that my role in discipling consists of one thing: to be available for other people. Just to be there. When they struggle with an area of life, rather than me telling them, “Oh, you shouldn’t be struggling,” or “You should be doing this, this, this and this,” instead I’ll be asking , “How can I be there for you to help you become more like Jesus?”
Because when it all comes down to it, God makes disciples. And He makes them by His means, in His time, under His conditions. What He asks of me is that I be available for His use as a tool in other people’s lives. “Here am I, send me” is not just a call to the mission field, but the call of one person to walk alongside another.

Amen. I’ve learned this lesson too, and seen it work. I’ve got nothing much to offer people but my ear, and I’m amazed, when I give that alone, what good it can do in their lives. Amazed.
I need to remember that. I get bogged down in not knowing enough, understanding perfectly and having all the right answers. I don’t need any of that, I just need to be there, listening.
And no, Dan is not from the ICOC. I wouldn’t be surprised if he never heard of us. Just goes to show, we were not alone in our folly.
Also, check out his amazing list of 100 truths he’s learned in 30 years as a disciple. I’m approaching the 2 decade mark so I ought to be able to a list of 60 or so such proverbs. Not even close.

And She Said Yes …

15 years ago, on a chilly Cincinnati evening, while thousands of little ones were running from door to door looking for tricks or treats, I knelt down (right about here) and asked this amazing small woman who had flipped my world around to do the unthinkable – spend the rest of her life next to me.
The crazy woman said yes.
And the roller coaster began. My life would never be the same, the twists and turns were unexpected – and joyous. Who knew there was so much out there that I would never have seen. If I could, I’d do it all over again. Twice.
The funny thing is that I asked her to share my journey, but it’s been me sharing hers that has been the blessing.
Thanks Honey.

Walking Novels

A good reminder from Patrick Mead:

Treat everyone special today. They are having a hard time of it. They are novels that will never be written. Instead, they will be lived out, a 3D play about good and evil, darkness and light.

It always seems that folks have it all together, and I don’t. Take heart – none of us do. We’re just good actors.
Also good to keep in mind when you think that there’s not much for you to do to minister to the people around you. There is, they just hide their needs well. Go love them and see what happens.

Now How Much Will You Pay?

There have been some rumblings of late about the proposal formally known as the UP, now the UPC. I’ve thought about posting on it, but Pinakidion has been doing a good job at keeping up with it. Alan has a great essay on it up now too. Mostly I prefer to ignore it lately.
This past week however, was the big leaders shindig, the International Leadership Conference. There was a lot of UPC activity. There’s still a push to get the rest of the churches who haven’t signed to get with the program and ratify the dumb thing.
But the thing that got my attention was a report on the delegate meeting at a new site that I just learned about, ICOC Hot News. The site is run by Mike Taliaferro & Justin Renton. Mike wrote the report on the delegate meeting. This is what got my attention.

Disciples Today is asking each first world church to give $6 per member per year to help maintain and expand our web presence. All agreed that Disciples Today needs to be a website without subscription fees. Of course, the delegates have no authority to tax anyone. They will simply appeal to the local congregations for support.

I like the fact that they at least agree that they can’t tax us, that’s nice. I also like that they think that Disciples Today shouldn’t have subscription fees. Both come right after asking for $6/member to run DT.
For our 120 member church, that’s $720 per year to DT. That’s over 10 times what I spend on salguod.net, and I bet it’s many times what our church spends on its web site.
Lets do a little math. Mission Memo reports an estimated 2006 ICOC membership of around 88,500 and that 38% are in the USA. That means about 33,600 folks in the US. Assuming that they are only asking USA churches (they are likely asking all 1st world, a higher number) for $6 that means they are asking for $201,700 per year for DT.
That’s absolutely nuts. That’s over 2,000 times the cost of running salguod.net. No reason at all that it should cost so much. I would guess it should cost a hundredth of that amount. Where in the world are they going to spend $200 grand? Salaries? How many full time folks do they need and at what salary? Someone tell me that I interpreted this wrong.
The bigger question to me is didn’t any of the delegates have a calculator? Did this proposal just go through unquestioned? I have no idea, but Mike reports it rather nonchalantly as if it was perfectly reasonable.
Not to mention that DT is not the best designed site. When I was a member, I found it hard to navigate and a little buggy. The connections feature (one of the reasons I actually joined) was disappointing as there weren’t many folks on it and it actually was an additional cost to connect with the few that were there. If they are going to command the kind of money that they have been ($40 per year membership fee now for first world individuals) or collect from churches at the rate they are proposing, they need to seriously update the site.
I’ve got an idea. I’ll do it for half that amount. That’s right Cooperating Churches, give me a mere $100,000 per year and I’ll run DT. What a bargain.
I guess I’ve got something to talk to the board about now.

For ‘Christian’

To Christian:
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment on my blog. Unfortunately, I had to remove it. It was pleasant, did not contain any rude offers to enhance my anatomy or it’s performance, links to unpleasant images, offers to get me neat drugs at unbelievable prices, link to Texas Hold ’em or offer me unbelievable stock deals. I even visited your ‘Christian’ web site, which seemed nice enough, although I don’t understand it’s purpose other than generating AdSense revenue.
I removed you comment because, despite its pleasantries and wishes for God’s blessings, it had nothing to do with the post it was made on. In fact,. it had nothing to do with my site at all. Its only purpose seemed to be to get a link to your site on mine. In fact, I’ve seen your nearly identical comment on another blog, equally out of context. Sorry, but my comment form doesn’t exist to give you an opportunity to link your site and build traffic. It’s there to foster dialog and build relationships.
I doubt that you’ll be back, so you probably won’t read this. If you do come back, you’re welcome to join in the discussion on the topic at hand, but not to place an ad for your web page.
That’s called ‘spam’ and it’s not a very Christian thing to do.
Thanks,
Salguod

Ezekiel – Chapter 43-44

Ezekiel 43:5 – The Spirit carries him into the inner court, a place where he likely has never been in real life. A place that only a few men have gone and only a few times. Imagine how that would have felt to have God bring you into his most private place. (After reading further (Ezekiel 44:15-27), I don’t think this is the most holy place, behind the curtain, where the high priest would only go once a year. Still, it’s the inner court, a special holy place, with special rules and only the Levites are to go there.)
Ezekiel 43:10-12 – Now I know why there was 3 chapters on the design of the temple.
Ezekiel 43:18-27 – As I read this ritual for cleansing the alter, it struck me how rediculous and scandalous Jesus would have seemed. God is Holy, He reequired elaborate steps from us to purify us that we may approach His holines. It is not a simple thing, it requires a lot of specific, sacred steps to be in the right condition to approach God.
But along comes this Jesus, and He talks as if God can be your best buddy in comparison. He brings all sort of unholy folks around him and doesn’t even attempt to cleanse them. It would seem as though he’s triffling with God, treating him with contempt. It would seem that Jesus is mocking the rituals that remind them of God’s holiness. He’s not, of course, but I can imagine how hard that would be to see.
Ezekiel 44:9 – God demands holiness and purity.

Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters – Chapter 2

My reading of Meg Meeker’s Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters stalled, but I’m picking it back up. My posting on it just flat died, so I’m going to try to catch up.
Chapter 2 – She needs a hero.
What does a hero do? A hero has strong convictions. Unwavering convictions. A hero stands firm. A hero will step in, even when it’s uncomfortable, unpopular or even dangerous. A hero puts others’ needs before their own.
Firemen. Paramedics. Soldiers. Doctors. Knights. Things every kids wants to be at some point. Why? They’re all heroes and we want to be the hero.
Meg points out “I have news for you. Your daughter wants a hero – and she has chosen you. (pg. 29)” I don’t know about the rest of you Dads, but that puts a lump in my throat.
One of the powerful things about the way this book is written is how Dr. Meeker intertwines her words with examples from her practice and experience that back them up. This chapter includes several stories of men who were heroes to their girls and how it strengthened them, and one of a man who failed to rush to his daughter’s side and how it devastated her.
Your daughter needs and wants you to lead. Lead with determination, conviction and authority. She gets security from your authority. You’re big, strong, tough and she leans on that. Dr. Meeker says:

The only way you will alienate your daughter in the long term is by loosing her respect, failing to lead, or failing to protect her. If you don’t provide for her needs, she will find someone else who will – and that’s when the trouble starts. Don’t let that happen. (pg. 30)

She may test you, push back, challenging your authority.

… remember that when she pushes hard against your rules, flailing, crying that you are mean or unfair, she is really asking you a question: Am I worth the fight, Dad? Are you strong enough to handle me? (pg. 32)

At every stage of life, she’s going to be looking to you for guidance. Tell her what you believe, don’t be afraid to jump in with your opinions. This seems obvious to me, that’s what parents are to do. But I can find myself getting shy about forcing my way on her. Is it really the right thing to do? Yep, absolutely says Dr. Meeker. She needs to find her way, yes, but my experience and wisdom need to light the path as she does. Otherwise, she’ll be groping in the dark and who knows what she might find. I need to act with authority.

Dad, that’s what your daughter wants from you. Your daughter doesn’t have to like your mannerisms, your rules, your clothes or your political views, but you never what to loose her respect. And you won’t if you live your moral beliefs and act with authority. If you d that, you’ll be a hero in her eyes. (pg. 39)

One of the toughest things about this, is keeping at it. We get tired and our girls are relentless. I know that I wear down quickly when the choruses of “Please! Pretty, please!” start up. As they get older it can be tempting to let our guard down more, but the dangers are even greater. We have to persevere.

If only you had to fight for her once, twice or even ten times, the process wouldn’t be so tough. But you might have to fight for her two hundred times. You only have eighteen short years before she is on her own. If you don’t show her the high road now, she won’t find it later. Perseverance in setting her on that road isn’t easy. She might appear embarrassed by your interventions. She might sulk. She might even say that she hates you. But you can see what she can’t. You know how sixteen year old boys react when they see her in a halter top. you know how even one beer can make her unsafe to drive. You know a lot more than she does, and however hard it is to persevere in leading her the right way, you have to do it. (pg. 42)

She ends with some tips (pg. 47-48):

  1. Make a plan. Your vision for her life will be clearer when she’s younger. Write it down and stick to it.
  2. Have courage under fire. You’ll be fired upon from all sides, keep your cool and lead by your convictions.
  3. Be the Leader. This is the hardest for me. I’m a softy, but I can see things she can’t. “She’s still a kid. So you lead; don’t let her.”
  4. Don’t cave, persevere. “Heroes see a battle through to the end, they never run away.”

This seems daunting to me. I’m too soft, I cave too quickly. But Dr. Meeker ends with hope:

This is a tall order, but I have seen enough heroic fathers to know that it’s an order that every good man can fill if he sets himself to it. … You were made a man for a reason. … So listen to your instincts, and do what’s right. Be a hero. (pg. 48)

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