Ecclesiastes 2:1-11 – Who hasn’t, at some time or another, thought that just a little more income or even just a one time windfall, would make our lives so much better. I know I do.
Solomon had the luxury few of us will experience, the financial ability to run after whatever his heart desired. There was no “If only …”, he had the means to do whatever he wanted, and he did. In the end he found that it “all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun“.
Ecclesiastes 2:13 – “there is more gain in wisdom than in folly, as there is more gain in light than in darkness” Not all the meaningless toil is equally meaningless.

So I hated life, because what is done under the sun was grievous to me, for all is vanity and a striving after wind.

Ecclesiastes 2:17

I’ve felt this way sometimes. What good is life, all that I value and strive for, all that is important to me will be gone and unremembered not long after I’m gone. What’s the point?
Actually, verse 18 captures more of how I’ve felt: “I hated all my toil in which I toil under the sun”. But Solomon hated it because fo what would become of it, I just hate to work. If it’s all just going to decay and break, why bother? Why not just sit on the couch?
But I’ve learned that there is joy and contentment in work, which, honestly, ticks me off. Case in point, yesterday I was faced with projects to get done and I really just wanted to relax. Our disposal had sprung a leak, the patio furniture needed to be put away and the last lawn treatment needed done. The others could be (somewhat) safely postponed, but an unusable kitchen sink wasn’t going to fly, so i got to work. I diagnosed the problem, went to Home Depot and got the new one, installed it and replaced the dripping faucet flex line. I also picked up some weatherstripping for our entry door and got that replaced. I took advantage of the warm evening and got up on the roof to put up the Christmas lights (don’t worry, they won’t get turned on until Thanksgiving).
I never got to the patio funiture or the lawn treatment, but today I awoke refreshed adn content in a way that I normally do not. God has made us to work, and in that work, even as temporary as it may be, we find contentment and fulfillment. It ticks me off because my way is different. I want to lounge, to indulge, to be lazy. It’s a lie and a seduction, however, because he call of relaxation instead produces anxiety. The restlessness that comes from living outside of God’s purpose. God is at work and he created us to be at work as well.
Solomon realized this as well:

There is nothing better for a person than that he should eat and drink and find enjoyment in his toil. This also, I saw, is from the hand of God …

Ecclesiastes 2:24

The joy is in the act of working, not in the results of the work. Like so much in the world, it’s backward from our understanding. We work for the end result, He works for the joy in working.

As I was finishing up my study of Mark, I kept thinking about Ecclesiastes. My mental state of late has wondered what the meaning of all this stuff we do. I mean, who cares about my basement getting finished or my old car or most anything in the grand scheme of things. It’s a little fatalist and depressing (don’t worry Mom, I’m fine), but that’s where I’ve been. It’s So today I start a study of Ecclesiastes.
I also hope to (once again) recommit myself to more serious study and reading of the scriptures. I said study and reading. My studies will be posted here, but I need to spend other free moments just reading. No note taking, no blogging, just reading. I’ve generally put off my study time until I can be at the computer taking notes no the blog. There’s a place for that, but that kind of time s harder to find. There are little moments where I can just break open the eSword on my phone or the Bible on the side table and read for a few minutes. no expectations but taking it in.
I’ve been trying to do that with my older girls in the morning. I’ve been reading Matthew out loud as they get breakfast. I say try, because getting two middle schoolers up at 6 AM can be challenging. We generally get some reading in at least 2-3 days a week though.
Anyway, that’s where I am.

What does man gain by all the toil
at which he toils under the sun?
A generation goes, and a generation comes,
but the earth remains forever.

Ecclesiastes 1:3-4

This I can relate to lately. What’s the point? Fix things up, they just break again. Gather and gather and you now have more things to look after. Things that begin to break as soon as you get them home. In the end, what does it gain? Life feels particularly short these days. I think it’s the down turn of my body after 40, seeing friends age, seeing my parents age and seeing me now where they were when I was growing up and them where my grandparents were. We’ve both stepped to the next square on the game board and I still feel like I’m back where I was. I wasn’t done there yet. The arc of life feels more real than it used to.
There’s nothing new here, everyone deals with it. I’m not overly depressed about it (I don’t think), but I’m not particularly happy these days either. This too will pass.
Maybe Ecclesiastes isn’t a good book to read under theses circumstances (any thoughts on that?). I’m hoping the conclusions that Solomon reached (which I already know) will bring some contentment to my soul.
Kansas Bob posted the other day that he used to rule the world. Things weer black and white and he thought he was in control with his destiny. Then life happened and he learned it was an illusion. At the end of the post he wrote:

I no longer rule the world but I am content with my place in it.

That’s where I long to get. I understand the first part, but I’ve yet to achieve the second. I’m hoping Solomon will help me.
Ecclesiastes 1:8 – “For in much wisdom is much vexation, and he who increases knowledge increases sorrow.” This verse made me think of those who pursue the Bible as the end rather than the means. In other words, they long to know their Bible more than they long to know God. I’ve never had that problem :-D, rather I’ve forgotten too often that the God I strive to know is revealed in the Bible. Knowing the Bible is a means to the end of knowing Him.