{"id":175,"date":"2004-07-24T14:50:11","date_gmt":"2004-07-24T14:50:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/salguod.net\/blog\/2004\/07\/to_fathers_of_d.shtml"},"modified":"2021-05-29T02:48:42","modified_gmt":"2021-05-29T02:48:42","slug":"to_fathers_of_d","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/salguod.net\/blog\/2004\/07\/to_fathers_of_d.shtml","title":{"rendered":"To Fathers of Daughters"},"content":{"rendered":"

This has been rattling around in my head for some time. Two fisted blogger Jared (Mysterium Tremendum <\/a>and Thinklings<\/a>) has a great post entitled “An Open Letter to Fathers of Sons<\/a>” inspired by a gut wrenchingly honest post at Emerging Sideways called daddy’s girl – an open letter to fathers of daughters<\/a>. Although the subject matter is a bit different, they inspired me to put this down on paper, so to speak.<\/i>
\nI am a father of three girls, 5, 7 and 9 years old. They are rapidly, far too rapidly, moving toward adulthood and facing the world and all its madness. My biggest goal as a Dad is to prepare them for that eventuality. Get them ready to face anything. Equip them, not with the answers, but with the tools to be able to find<\/i> the answers.
\nThe purpose of this post, however, is not to address the entire range of what it means to raise a girl. No, it’s to Dad’s and to a specific role that Dad’s need to play that I think many Dad’s don’t see as their business – how their girls dress. Now I’ve probably gotten the Moms’ (and maybe a few daughters) attentions. What does he know about fashion? Trust me, I understand that he knows nothing of fashion. I’ll respectfully ask the Mom’s to be quiet for a minute and let me finish. I’ll have some insight for you later.
\nI am not asking Dad to become the host of TLC’s ‘What Not To Wear’, but it’s time that Dad’s spoke up about your daughter’s wardrobe. You see, Dad, you know something that Mom can have no knowledge of – how guys think. God in his wisdom had made men and women differently. More that just differences in anatomy, there are fundamental differences in how we think, especially in regards to sex. Guys are aroused in ways that are foreign to women, primarily by sight. Why do you think there are hundreds of ‘girly’ mags and web sites, but only a few devoted to images of guys? (No, I have not<\/b> done any real research here, only some casual observations.) Why is hubby always trying to steal a glimpse of Mom in the shower or while dressing? Those images do something for guys that they don’t for women.
\nSo, Dad, you know what will be going through the mind of the young men that will see your girl as she goes out dressed like that<\/I>. You know that the spiritual young man will me counting the flowers on the wall paper and trying his best not to look at<\/i> her (which she might interpret as a lack of interest, uncaring and insensitive) so that he can ‘take captive every thought’ and avoid the sin of lust. You also know that the unspiritual young man will look at her, all<\/i> of her, (which she might interpret as interest and care) letting his mind roam free. It’s up to you to communicate that to your daughter and put your foot down on the tight t-shirts, bare midriffs, hip huggers, too short shorts and the like. To her it makes her cute and attractive, absolutely innocent things in her world. To the boys around her, she’s the immediate object of lust, fantasy and desire.
\nWhile I applaud and completely agree with Jared’s admonition to Fathers of boys to teach their boys to treat girls with respect and to ‘try to raise your sons not to go around looking for opportunities to satisfy their lustful appetites’, the fact of the matter is that many, many boys will grow up without such instruction and our girls will be surrounded with them. And the fact remains; even boys so trained have a ‘lustful appetite’. What service do we do them by sending our girls out clad to make resisting it more difficult?
\nI said I’d have something for the Mom’s and here it is: Listen to your man when he says that perhaps Suzie shouldn’t wear that outfit. I suspect that many women poo-poo such input thinking that they know nothing about fashion, that’s a Mom’s business. (And for the same reasons I think that Dads are too hesitant to speak up, but I’ve covered that.) Mom, you need to remember where Dad’s coming from when he does<\/i> speak up and respect it. You may be tempted to say something like “Well, boys just shouldn’t be that way.” Horse hockey. Not that boys shouldn’t resist temptation, but that part of this is how we’re wired. God has made us to be aroused simply by the sight of you ladies and no finger wagging and admonition to boys is going to change that.
\nI was once told a story of a minister’s wife who did not heed her husband’s caution about her own dress (perhaps that caution was not strong enough). One day, a man made her a less than pure offer to get together. Shocked, she asked why he would think that the wife of the preacher would be interested in such a thing? His reply was something along the lines of “Well, the way you dress I figured you were looking for something.” She said that that radically changed her view of her wardrobe.
\nDads, our role is to prepare these precious little girls to enter the world. One of the biggest things we can do to help them is to give them a little insight into who those boys around them are and what they’re thinking.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This has been rattling around in my head for some time. Two fisted blogger Jared (Mysterium Tremendum and Thinklings) has a great post entitled “An Open Letter to Fathers ofRead More To Fathers of Daughters<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[4,2],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nTo Fathers of Daughters - salguod.net<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/salguod.net\/blog\/2004\/07\/to_fathers_of_d.shtml\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"To Fathers of Daughters - salguod.net\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This has been rattling around in my head for some time. 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